Dealing with Grief

Everyone at some point in time or another will experience the pain of the loss of a loved one. This can be a slow drawn out experience for some, or an abrupt shock for others. I myself experienced this with the latter.  Part of the cycle of life, however, it can be debilitating, and the shock can create an amnesia like quality for some time after the event.

I decided I should write a bit about this on my page since I have more friends and clients going through this at this time.  As a Tibetan Buddhist practitioner for me it has allowed my bond in my practice to grow stronger, as with any belief system I think that is very helpful during times of loss.  It took me years to figure out that death doesn’t mean the person is gone. They are always here with you in spirit and memory (in Tibetan Buddhism the mind is in the heart center).  I came across different mediums that discuss this topic and if you pay attention to the signs they are there, and they are listening to us.

I had a hard time dealing with the passing of my mother who in my opinion died too young. The doctors, I had anger with them for misdiagnosing her… it still leaves a bad taste in my mouth.  I finally realized with my practice and the death of a dear friend that it was their time to go. I now believe if it wasn’t this that happened, that it would have been in another form.  When the karma beans are up they are up.

That just occurred to me recently… and for me it gave me a little bit of solace. I had gone to do HMR for myself after the passing of my mother with Brent Baum. We reframed the scene (in a specific way) with her in the hospital on breathing machines. I had just had a baby and the hospital staff would not let me be with her since they didn’t know what was wrong with her. I had so many questions, so many feelings of guilt for not being next to her side because they would not let me… but now and after training for the reframing for these snapshots in my mind, I am not as affected by it in my body. I don’t feel the rush of adrenaline, the overwhelming sadness (I still get teared up of course missing her), like I did when recalling such a horrific situation. I was able to remove that from my body reacting in a way that froze time.

My mother died of sepsis. A horrible way to go… and unfortunately so did my dear friend in his 30’s. This among many other events in my life, lead me to do my training in HMR and to help others get through the pain. The funny thing is, my mother introduced me to Brent Baum in my later teen years. Its now my path to help others heal themselves, to get through the grief, the guilt the shame of any past trauma. I hope if anyone is experiencing this grief that they feel they can reach out and try a few sessions with me and get on the road to recovery from loss.

I do mediation and Medicine Buddha prayers for my clients prior to their sessions with me to be fully present with them and create the intention for healing.

Love and Light, Heather

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